It would be instances where I wanted to go out with my friends, I mean I was young it's what I wanted to do.
And he wouldn’t like it and I'd either receive sulking or he'd get a irritable about it or he'd question me about the night quite intensely about other men and did anyone try chatting you up, all that kind of stuff that wasn’t, in retrospect, very healthy.
But at the time how did you feel about it?
At the time it was ... I remember feeling slightly put out about it, because that wasn’t something I'd experienced before but it was my first serious relationship where I felt like he really cared for me. So I think I didn't have an understanding then that wasn’t just part of somebody caring that much for you.
Yeah, yeah and what other things did you notice? You talked about jealousy as the relationship progressed, what other aspects were difficult for you?
So as it progressed he started ... let me think. So he started kind of using tactics to make me sure he was my entire world I guess.
And so he started trying to, trying to put me off my friends. At first it was subtle and I hardly noticed it, it would be digs at them or making me believe that they're not good for me and things like that. And then that progressed into trying to stop me from seeing my friends and things like that, he was trying to isolate me, essentially and... so that started to become difficult because then his view of the world was my only perspective really. So when it did get worse and worse all the time it was difficult to, it was difficult to be able to step back and be able to analyse it logically and realise that it wasn’t actually very healthy at all.
So at the time, how did you feel at the time, you know, feeling like you weren't able to see your friends and so on?
I started to ... because in parallel to this he had also started putting me down, kind of digging away at my confidence. I started to feel like I didn't necessarily want to be going out as much anyway. And when it did start getting worse and worse he would actually try humiliating me when we were out in public in front of his friends and my friends and stuff and all that made me want to do was then not go out. So, so yeah it kind of all started to intertwine and just got worse and worse and worse as time went on.
Konstantinos Vasilis Petrides ("K. V. Petrides") proposed a conceptual distinction between the ability based model and a trait based model of EI and has been developing the latter over many years in numerous publications.   Trait EI is "a constellation of emotional self-perceptions located at the lower levels of personality."  In lay terms, trait EI refers to an individual's self-perceptions of their emotional abilities. This definition of EI encompasses behavioral dispositions and self-perceived abilities and is measured by self report , as opposed to the ability based model which refers to actual abilities, which have proven highly resistant to scientific measurement. Trait EI should be investigated within a personality framework.  An alternative label for the same construct is trait emotional self-efficacy .